It’s International Women’s Day. It’s got me thinking about all you wonderful women around the world. Are you treating yourself today? Are you being kind to you, in some way? Are you engaging in something that brings you joy? Something that’s just for you?
That leads me to this question: Do you even know what brings you joy, in the first place? Are you like many women, trying to remember what it was that made you happy, what made you tick, before you got so overwhelmed with life circumstances?
Recently some of my sister friends have been pondering this very question for themselves. How have I forgotten to take care of myself? What is it that makes me happy? How can I bring more fun and joy back into my life? What can I do for me that will rejuvenate and replenish me?
It sometimes seems like women are set to a default setting of prioritizing everyone and everything around them. Whether you are a mother, a wife, a business woman etc., there is the tricky tendency to loose yourself in caring for everyone and everything else around you. Until one day you find yourself right in the middle of your forgotten self, wondering who you are, where you went, and what was it again that made your heart excited.
I love the story from one of my sister friends. She was years in an unhealthy and controlling relationship. Being in a contracted state was the norm – living on the edge. Until one day she had a remembrance. She remembered that she loved having bubble baths! It came as a shock. Such a simple thing. Yet something that used to bring her so much joy and pleasure. How could she have forgotten? Where had she been all this time? Lost to herself. But now, in this simple remembering, she was coming back.
This was a huge turning point in her life. She kept following that trail of good feelings, slowly at first. That first bubble bath. That led to more rememberings as well as many new discoveries. She’s now living a very expansive life, with a wonderful partner, and is finding new things every day that bring her joy!! And it all started with remembering her love of bubble baths!
For me, it was Oprah! It was 2014. I’d been in Austin, Texas for 2 years – moving here from Ireland to be with my honey. While I had moved to be with my wonderful husband, in a wonderful city, the feeling of loss and being lost (loosing family, friends, country, work, income, status) was overwhelming. Though my life was beautiful in so many ways, my mind was somehow stuck in lostness. An inbetweeness. Neither here nor there.
Then one day I had an inspired and unusual thought. What is it that I enjoy? What used I do that made me happy? Something that Brenda used to do just for herself, before she moved to a new country and got married? I didn’t have an answer at first.
My answer – watching The Oprah Show! When I lived in Cork, I’d walk home from work every single afternoon to make lunch and watch Oprah. Hail, rain or shine (and in Ireland, there’s a lot of the first two options!). It was a needed constant in my life, providing deep, nourishing sustenance for my soul. How is it that we can forget about those things that bring us such life-giving gifts?
I immediately went on a search for Oprah! Her last Oprah Show aired a few weeks before I left home to go live in the USA. Shared endings. But I didn’t know about her new beginning. Like I hadn’t found mine either. She now had her own network and was airing super soul conversations every Sunday. Sitting down to watch that first Super Soul Sunday, I knew I was finally landing in my new life here. A deep familiar place was opening back up within. Touching base with something so simple yet true to me, brought me back to myself and allowed me to start to really and truly land in my new life. Since then, our Super Soul Sundays are some of my husband and I’s most treasured time together.
Remember, that returning to yourself, finding and re-finding your joy and simple pleasures, is also the biggest gift you can give to those around you. (It is not being selfish, it is being self-full).
What’s your bubble bath? What’s your Oprah? What makes you feel like you are taking care of you? What feeds your soul? What is your type of fun, your type of enjoyment?
With Love,
Brenda
